It was more than few years ago I was scratching out a living pushing a mop at MIT. You know, running around with my buddies, chasing skirts, drinking beer and hassling Barneys.
So, it was out of sheer boredom that I completed that “unsolvable” theorem written on a hallway chalkboard. After all, I was always good at arithmetic, what you less geniusey-types refer to as “math.” (Between you and I, I thought I was doing a Soduku.) Who knew?
Anyway, my therapist, Sean, who was total doppelgänger for Robin Williams, wanted one thing for me. Professor Lambeau wanted another. He repeatedly told me to call him Gerry and would call me, drunk, and invite me to his place to show me his “Fields Medal.” He’d say over and over, “It’s really big and impressive.” Whatever.
I decided to follow Sean’s advice. I left behind several lucrative job offers to follow this girl, Skylar, to Stanford University. I’d only gone out with her, like, three times. She had freckles, I think and she thought she could play in the NBA. Bitch, please!?!?
I hopped in my beater, that my boys bought me for my 21st birthday, and headed west. Unfortunately, the POS broke down outside of Goshen, Indiana. I just stayed there. I eventually got a gig doing nights on Goshen College radio. (Go Leafs!!!)
I eventually did make it out west, albeit not to California, but to Las Vegas where I now co-host the Chet Buchanan Show radio program. In addition, I write and produce comedy that airs nationally through Delicious Audio.
So you know, I haven’t completely gotten out of the math game. I’ve been known to balance an occasional check book and during tax time I do a little part-time work at Walmart in the Jackson-Hewitt kiosk.
Today, when people ask me, “How do I like them apples?” I respond, “In a pie with a golden brown flaky crust and maybe a dollop of Cool Whip.”
If it’s a foreign-made product, you’ve probably been saying it wrong. Here’s a quick and simple guide.
Happy Nevada Day! Spence dishes out some state knowledge to the masses with Nevada Day Fun Facts!
Spence’s Challenge is easy! All you have to do is read up and correctly answer 5 trivia questions on the top headlines in today’s latest pop culture news…
Five pop culture trivia questions, 30 seconds…
If you were listing live this morning then you’d know that today’s Spence’s Challenge was probably the memorable game we’ve ever played…
We all know someone with FUF. And every time we see them we think, “Man, why is he wearing flip flops?” Someone call 911 and get this man some shoes because he’s got serious Shaq-like FUF. It’s Spence’s Song of the Week.
Do you have what it takes to beat Spence in Spence’s Challenge?
Spence won his 11th game in a row today, adding another $25.00 into the Terrible Herbst Spence’s Challenge Jackpot, for a new grand total of $373!
If you had to choose the best band from Nevada, whom would you choose? The Killers? Imagine Dragons? Someone else? Thrillist.com chimes in.
With $1,323 on the line, it may be worth it to read something in your timeline…..